Not a good morning!!! What the heck happened??

Oh my goodness! Not a good morning at all!! I gotta blog about this so I can try and get this out of my head!!! Because the anxiety is going to be horrible if this keeps up all day!!

I woke up a little after 8am and could feel I was lightheaded already. With light headedness I get that lagged movement feeling. Does that make sense? Where u move ur head to look at something of just to turn and it takes a minute for ur brain to process it all. Yuck! I usually refer to this as feeling out of ur body, because its like watching yourself in slow motion sometimes. Anyway, I got up and took my zofran and went to lay back down. I tried to go back to sleep but it didn't work. I just lay there feeling my body work. I could feel it pumping the blood thru, I could feel it try and decide if I was gonna have dry heaves, if I needed to go to the bathroom again or not...ugh...yuck. I could hear my heart beat start echoing in my head, and feel it beat in my neck. This is when the anxiety takes over. I decided I needed to blog this morning so I can get these thoughts out of my head versus keeping them in. After all that's what my blog is for right?!

I am extremely nauseous right now and feel like I could throw up literally any second!!! I really don't want to! I'm hoping my body is just tricking me. I haven't fully thrown up since a few weeks ago when I was at work and my dad had to pick me up and drive me to the doc. I got 2 bags of IVs that day :) it was nice. (Afterwards!!)
I don't really want a repeat of the marathon puke session and I really just want my anxiety about this to all go away!! I don't know why it changes so drastically?!?! One of the GREAT unknowns of HG! How extremely lame!!! I have a TON of work to do today, and it NEEDS to get done as it is for my real job! Maybe I can try and start on it and it won't be so bad! OR it will be worse! Ugh
DAMN YOU HG!!! I LOATH YOU!!!

I'll blog more later

Until Later
~J