This afternoon I decided to let all my guards down and just let everything go. I just had gotten out of the shower I was in there so long I used all the hot hot water. Shhh don't tell the hubs!!! I just sat there on the built in seat, thoughtless letting the water rinse my cares away. I really had not a thought in my head. When I finally got out I dried off and blow dried my hair for another 20+ mins. Long after my hair was dry. (Something calming about that damn hair dryer) I got dressed, and crawled on my bed and cried....I sobbed...I blubbered like an idiot, I shook, I drooled, and I cried uncontrollably. I just let it all out. After about 20 mins I was finally out of years, thoroughly stuffed up, and soaked the hubs pillow with snot, spit, and tears. I slowly got up, and felt relieved for the most part.
I know I got this, I know I'm almost through this, I know all of this shit is worth it, but darn it; I'm human. I am human...and I can't do it all the time. I have every right to let my tough guy guard down just like the next person. I'm strong, but I can only do so much. I need to remember that. I need a little card to carry around with me that reminds me of this!
Thank for listening
Until Later
~J
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Please feel free to comment, But please note that I am human and by posting mean hurtful things, you are in fact HURTING my feelings. If you don't have anything nice to say, then you don't need to say anything at all. With that being said....I would love to hear from you =D